Even now as I write this the thoughts I had just moments ago are fleeting. My mother told me about how the memory seems to fade somewhat with age but of course being young I dismissed it as something that only would happen to her.
Well here I am. I still am pretty sharp when it comes to keeping it all together and experience pulls me through when I have that blank moment. I use to be able to grab the thought from thin air and it would come in the next instant but now those thoughts are more fleeting. Or rather they disappear into a black hole.
I always prided myself on being able to give two hour lectures without any notes. I taught Costume History for a number of years and the dates and names just seem to be right within reach. Now I find myself misplacing the next word in the sentence! I guess I should be somewhat concern about it all but I know that I am not alone. The baby boomers may not want to admit it but they are right there with me. Me being one of them.
I have to admit I get frustrated when I can’t remember my thought and even become angry with myself for being so “stupid”. But then again I got angry at myself when I was younger for not being experienced enough.
So there you have it. I have come to conclusion that no matter what phase of my life I am in I will always find something I can learn from no matter how off putting it can be. That each phase of my life from the insecurity of youth to the insecurity of age is going to come whether I like it or not.
At least now I don’t dwell so much on my misgivings because I’m hoping I won’t remember having them! Ah, bliss in the lack of memory!